It continues to amaze me.
The amount of stupidity that people carry around in themselves is jaw dropping
Unbelievable.
Dear strangers that call me everyday all day long
I'm not sitting here on the other side of this phone holding your packages/checks/
Christmas gifts/bday cards hostage
I'm trying to help you. I do not know your every situation so please don't expect this of me
If you continue to: cuss,argue,raise your voice at me, talk to me like IM the stupid one
Your calls will continually be "disconected :)
Thanks.
Laura
Yes there is a person on the other end of that phone line!
Thank God for the "release" button, for that which I might not get through the day.
-L
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Friday, December 25, 2009
beat it.
The dog tore up a roll of toilet paper
And somehow I'm being blamed for it.
This is Normal.
Something goes wrong, beyond anyones control and its my fault.
Normal.
Feeling absolutely fine when things are at their worst.
Normal.
What's the stopping point?
Can someone hit the breaks please?
Movies lie to us, music makes us believe its real but is it?
Watched 500 days of summer last night. Why don't I feel love?
Does it exist?
Is it bullshit? Fantasy? Unrealistic?
Today ... I think so.
And somehow I'm being blamed for it.
This is Normal.
Something goes wrong, beyond anyones control and its my fault.
Normal.
Feeling absolutely fine when things are at their worst.
Normal.
What's the stopping point?
Can someone hit the breaks please?
Movies lie to us, music makes us believe its real but is it?
Watched 500 days of summer last night. Why don't I feel love?
Does it exist?
Is it bullshit? Fantasy? Unrealistic?
Today ... I think so.
Monday, November 23, 2009
update
the new job is working out i think.
i did the whole hanging out with the co-workers thing this weekend and
it was such a blast, sans husband :[ but i think it was better that way (sorry lee)
getting up @ 5am is getting easier, but then again any excuse for getting up in the morning and getting paid for it, is worth it.
cant wait for my next pay check :]
thanksgiving is this week and prepping for that is always fun. cant wait to make pumpkin pie! of course anything with pumpkin is fabulous.
going to get ready for my day, listening to Adele. music is my life source. i probably wouldn't be able to wake up or function if it wasn't for music.
PANDORA SAVES LIVES.
until next time....
i did the whole hanging out with the co-workers thing this weekend and
it was such a blast, sans husband :[ but i think it was better that way (sorry lee)
getting up @ 5am is getting easier, but then again any excuse for getting up in the morning and getting paid for it, is worth it.
cant wait for my next pay check :]
thanksgiving is this week and prepping for that is always fun. cant wait to make pumpkin pie! of course anything with pumpkin is fabulous.
going to get ready for my day, listening to Adele. music is my life source. i probably wouldn't be able to wake up or function if it wasn't for music.
PANDORA SAVES LIVES.
until next time....
Monday, November 16, 2009
Dear Diary.
i haven't been blogging. instead Ive been going old school lately.
writing in my journal.
its simply therapeutic.
plus, i feel like nobody even reads this thing.
but heres a little update.
1. got a new job
2. got a fantastic apartment.
3.got a new obsession with shopping online.
cant wait to get a paycheck, so i can actually go shopping.
thats all ive got for today. but thats probably due to the fact that its 545 am.
writing in my journal.
its simply therapeutic.
plus, i feel like nobody even reads this thing.
but heres a little update.
1. got a new job
2. got a fantastic apartment.
3.got a new obsession with shopping online.
cant wait to get a paycheck, so i can actually go shopping.
thats all ive got for today. but thats probably due to the fact that its 545 am.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Thursday, September 24, 2009
feeling a little down today.
Fakeness.
its becoming too much to deal with.
friends?
so much for that.
feels like i don't know what those are anymore.
people who talk to you, but don't see you.
see you, but don't talk to you.
so much is going on around me and i feel helpless.
nobody needs my help, nobody knows i need their help.
promises broken, marriages faded, relationships torn.
feels like everyone around me is falling apart.
i probably shouldn't care so much, but unfortunately that's my downfall.
thinking I'm the one who can fix everything, only leaves me broken in the end.
definitely need a pick me up.
its becoming too much to deal with.
friends?
so much for that.
feels like i don't know what those are anymore.
people who talk to you, but don't see you.
see you, but don't talk to you.
so much is going on around me and i feel helpless.
nobody needs my help, nobody knows i need their help.
promises broken, marriages faded, relationships torn.
feels like everyone around me is falling apart.
i probably shouldn't care so much, but unfortunately that's my downfall.
thinking I'm the one who can fix everything, only leaves me broken in the end.
definitely need a pick me up.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Change.
So. I know its been a while and i said i was gonna blog every week and yada yada yada. i havent, being me right now is really difficult. there are many reasons why but the biggest reason of all is.... drumroll please...................................CHANGE. Laura Diane Medlin (formerly Perez,as i have been reminded of many times this weekend) does not do so well with change! and in the last couple of months, ive had to:
Say goodbye to my hubbins.
Move Across the country.
Get rid of most of my belongings.
Turn my Beagles into "outside dogs"
Get Adjusted to having cable.
Get Back in Church.
And Move back into my parents house.
oh and did i mention My Husband isnt here to help me through any of this???!
its kind of a tough thing to do.
Mentally.
and Lee took the hard drive with all of our music. so not even Coldplay therapy.
it would just remind me of him anyways.
i definatley am not sorry i came home, but i am sorry for making this blog a sort of Laura Pity Party.
i just wanna ask out there, to anyone whos reading this,
How does one deal with so much change?
it has to be possible. i obviously have gone through it before, moving across the country and whatnot.
but never ALONE.
in fact i dont think ive done anything alone. ive always had some sort of support group.
and now, i feel like ive lost contact with the world.
In Washington, it was like i could walk next door and talk to Misty.
Drive down the road and have oth marathons w/Trish.
and the other girls who became family and got me used to Military life.
In North Carolina the same thing. ive been lucky to have neighbors that become really good friends(KATJE!)
but San Antonio, i just dont belong.
i feel like i cant remember what i did when i lived here before.
Church?
i feel so out of place there.
i feel so uneeded here, everyones lived their lives without me.
anyways... thats it for now, sorry its a little imbalanced, im running on 5 hrs of sleep.
a 10 hr drive and 1 meal for the entire day.
Chris Martin is calling my name.
-Laura<3
Say goodbye to my hubbins.
Move Across the country.
Get rid of most of my belongings.
Turn my Beagles into "outside dogs"
Get Adjusted to having cable.
Get Back in Church.
And Move back into my parents house.
oh and did i mention My Husband isnt here to help me through any of this???!
its kind of a tough thing to do.
Mentally.
and Lee took the hard drive with all of our music. so not even Coldplay therapy.
it would just remind me of him anyways.
i definatley am not sorry i came home, but i am sorry for making this blog a sort of Laura Pity Party.
i just wanna ask out there, to anyone whos reading this,
How does one deal with so much change?
it has to be possible. i obviously have gone through it before, moving across the country and whatnot.
but never ALONE.
in fact i dont think ive done anything alone. ive always had some sort of support group.
and now, i feel like ive lost contact with the world.
In Washington, it was like i could walk next door and talk to Misty.
Drive down the road and have oth marathons w/Trish.
and the other girls who became family and got me used to Military life.
In North Carolina the same thing. ive been lucky to have neighbors that become really good friends(KATJE!)
but San Antonio, i just dont belong.
i feel like i cant remember what i did when i lived here before.
Church?
i feel so out of place there.
i feel so uneeded here, everyones lived their lives without me.
anyways... thats it for now, sorry its a little imbalanced, im running on 5 hrs of sleep.
a 10 hr drive and 1 meal for the entire day.
Chris Martin is calling my name.
-Laura<3
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